Winifred Hodge Rose
Assigned reading:
Primary runes in this bind-rune: Wunjo, Othala, Jera, Gebo, Algiz, Tiw, Nauthiz, Raidho, Kenaz.
Sefa
Sefa is a soul-part deeply rooted in our heart, our emotions, emotional perceptions and sensitivities. It is the ‘soul who cares’ within us, the soul who wants to relate to other beings and to situations through the process of perceiving, understanding and caring about them. This caring nature of Sefa is vulnerable to harm through mistreatment by other humans, and by ill-intentioned spirits as well. If Sefa suffers great harm to its caring nature, it can become grim and even savage in response; it covers, hardens, even denies its potential for caring behavior and relationships as a way of self-defense. Sefa is also vulnerable to worry, anxiety, sorrow, grief, even obsession, when it perceives or fears that the things it cares about and relates to are being threatened, harmed or lost.
Sefa is intimately related to our Hugr and Mod souls. As I wrote about in Dances with Daemons, and in Hunting the Wild Hugr, I see these two souls as ‘daemon-souls’, souls which can exist independently of us. I understand the original Mod-souls to have a non-human origin as elemental spirits, and the proto-Hugr-souls to originate as images and wisps of longing from the wetlands of Hel (see The Alchemy of Hel, Part VI). Both Mod and Hugr can be fierce, self-centered, grasping, laser-focused on what they want. I understand Sefa to be a humanizing influence on Mod and Hugr, potentially infusing them with compassion, empathy, caring, perceptiveness, all leading to deep and meaningful relationships with others.
Sefa’s desire for love, friendship and relationship flows out into the world through our Hugr soul, with its own longing for love and relationship. Sefa and Mod create their own common ground in our Modsefa, where ideally Sefa’s caring and commitment combine with Mod’s strength, courage and desire to act and to achieve in the world (see assigned reading). When these souls have been distorted, their fears, anger, grimness, envy, self-centeredness build upon each other as force-multipliers. Modsefa can change from the soul-space which blends all the best qualities of Mod and Sefa, to a space where anger, grimness, hatred and obsessions prevail. These soul-interrelationships, whatever form they may take, shape our character, temperament and behavior as they interact and express themselves in our life, and are in turn shaped by our life experiences and how we make use of those experiences.
The Selfish, Grim, or Savage Sefa
Each of our souls possesses its own sense of selfhood and can be consumed with pursuing its own self-interests; this is especially true of Mod, Hugr, and Ghost. Mod wants action, Hugr pursues its desires, Ghost focuses on its own disembodied interests. All of them can run roughshod over our other souls and our Lichama, over other people, and ignore or counteract the many concerns and responsibilities related to living in a community and in a healthy natural environment.
Sefa, too, can pursue a path of selfishness. The ‘relationship’ nature of Sefa can turn inward rather than outward, and care only for how other people treat us, unconcerned with how we treat other people. This leads to the ‘queen bee’ or ‘king of the heap’ phenomenon, where a person wants all the focus of attention on themself, and fails to offer caring interactions toward others. This can also lead to a person being consumed with grievances and resentments, believing that others owe them everything, and they owe others nothing. A perfect example of this is the ‘incel’ or ‘involuntary celibates’ belief, where resentful men feel entitled to get whatever they want from women, and become filled with anger, hatred and abuse when they don’t get it. It never seems to occur to them that it is impossible to create a healthy relationship with a person holding this super-selfish attitude, and that any sensible woman would avoid this situation like the plague. Of course, people of any gender can fall into such counterproductive selfishness; this is just one example.
In the old poetry, the Sefas of warriors, nobles and rulers are sometimes described as ‘grim’, and even ‘savage.’ It’s easy to see how their Sefas could take on these traits, especially in warriors, who are focused on killing others instead of on relating to them in any constructive way. The only way a healthy Sefa could take on such a focus is for self-defense and especially for the defense of others. It is easy for leaders to present any conflict in such terms: ‘defending the homeland, way of life, etc.’, whether that is literally true or not, and whether better solutions to the problem exist, or not. This is how people overcome the natural tendency of the Sefa-soul to care about others: by telling themselves that by these actions they really are caring for others, but only for others who ‘matter’. There are all kinds of justifications for strife and violence toward other people, and sometimes these justifications may be supported by facts, with both sides holding inimical attitudes, taking violent action against each other, and thus being forced to defend themselves.
People whose life and focus are rooted in these kinds of situations, whether they choose this or whether it is forced on them, may well develop a grim, and even a savage Sefa in response. Their Sefa is desperately wounded and distorted, and we see the results in people returning from a war zone, being released from prison or captivity, or stepping back from some other type of violent or abusive situation. Even though they may long for healthy relationships and a ‘normal’ life, it is very difficult and time-consuming for them to heal their Sefa sufficiently to be able to achieve this. All of their souls need to participate in this healing. Their Hugr needs to be especially involved by making its own changes in its framework of thought, its attitudes and behavior, so that it can support these changes in the Sefa.
Hugr as Sefa’s Warder
In my article Who is Hugr, I discussed the threefold nature of our Hugr soul. It is an ‘inner self’, where our desires and longings are rooted, where our thoughts and feelings work away like yeast within ourselves and establish our framework of thought. Along with Mod and others of our souls, Hugr establishes our character, our persona and ego. Secondly, Hugr is an inner warder, a soul-being who stands on the boundary between our inner and outer worlds, offering warnings, cautions, rede and wisdom, foresight and insight into knowledge that is hidden from our conscious mind. Hugr also has many skills and abilities for human social interaction, both positive and negative. Thirdly, in some circumstances Hugr can roam as an independent soul-entity, away from our body and sometimes even from our conscious awareness, to take its own actions in Midgard or in other worlds (see The Occult Abilities of the Hugr, Parts I and II).
In the previous study guides, I discussed Hugr’s roles within our inner self, as well as the role of our Mod soul which overlaps in many ways with Hugr. Here I will focus on Hugr’s warding role: the soul which stands between our innermost self and all the beings and influences of the outer world of Midgard, and worlds of spirit-beings, as well.
This ‘innermost self’, this tender part of ourselves which needs Hugr’s warding, is our Sefa. In an ideal and kindly world, Sefa would not need warding, and could reach out and relate as it wishes to everyone and everything. People from various different religions, professions and paths of life who treasure and pursue the path of compassion develop their Sefas very strongly. They have learned to courageously withstand the threats to their Sefa without Sefa burrowing into a hole to escape them, and have trained their Mod and Hugr to support Sefa’s standing-forth and action in the world. (Of course, they would not use these specific soul-concepts to describe what they do; this is my Heathen analysis of what is going on.)
Nevertheless, it happens all too often that people on the path of compassion become over-extended, burned-out, exhausted, suffer compassion-fatigue. They may be forced to withdraw from their efforts, temporarily or permanently, and sometimes may become cynical as a way to ward themselves from continued burnout. There are exceptions, in particular for very spiritual people who can access spiritual strength that can carry them beyond ordinary human levels of achievement and endurance. These people are often seen as ‘saints’, however their culture or religion defines that.
My understanding of Sefa is that it is not naturally strong in the abilities of judgment, strategic action, decision-making, analysis, and the like. Sefa is loving, impulsive, enthusiastic, eager, emotionally insightful and perceptive, but tends to be naïve in the ways of the world. It may not be cautious enough when it comes to acting on those caring impulses. This makes Sefa very vulnerable to exploitation and manipulation, and seduction of many kinds: sexual and relationship seduction (for example, seduced into becoming an ‘enabler’ or a co-dependent of someone else’s harmful behavior in the mistaken assumption that one is helping them), seduction of beliefs and principles, seduction into unhealthy and unprincipled paths of relationships, associations and actions. All of these situations are driven by the desire for relationship and connection, but they are pursued unwisely and without sufficient care for one’s overall well-being and safety, including one’s moral and mental health.
Sefa is also easily subject to worry and anxiety, things that inevitably develop whenever we care greatly about anything, including ourself. A Sefa unwarded by Hugr and not strengthened by Mod can go further, into panic attacks, obsessive-compulsive or overly-controlling behavior. This is even more likely, if the person’s Ferah-soul has been damaged by life-circumstances, leading to oversensitivity, hyper-reactiveness, fearfulness, phobias, and the like. (See Born of Trees and Thunder: The Ferah Soul.) Sefa and Ferah then interact in their worries, viewing the world as an existentially threatening place filled with threatening beings, with no refuge or help to be had. Then, when unscrupulous ‘helpers’ appear, and / or inaccurate ideas and beliefs that seem to resolve everything are presented to Sefa, it is all too easily led astray.
Here is where our Hugr-warder steps in. A well-developed Hugr is strong in the very areas where Sefa needs it: judgment, analysis, decisiveness, strategic thinking, boldness, clear-sightedness, firmness of purpose. Sefa and Hugr need each other. A healthy Sefa gives shape, warmth and expression to Hugr’s longings and desires, infusing them with emotional perceptiveness and empathy. A healthy Hugr protects Sefa from over-extension and from unwisely pursing Sefa’s emotional impulses. As they work together over the years of our life, these two souls create the potential for deep wisdom: wisdom of the heart combined with the wisdom of the world; wisdom shaped by perceptiveness, insight, judgment, compassion, and life-experience.
Invitations to Goddesses
If you like to work with the Deities, consider inviting Sif (Sippe, Sibbe), Sjöfn, Frigg, Syn and Hlin to work with you on the following exercises, and on your work with your Sefa in general. Sif is especially concerned with kinships, Sjöfn with the love and affection of romantic relationships and close friendships, though they and Frigg help with all relationships. Frigg is a supporter of frith and community relationships, where each person takes responsibility for maintaining the behavior and commitments that allow communities of any size and kind (family, workplace, neighborhood, city, etc.) to function fairly and productively. (Durkan’s Circle of Frith: A Devotional to Frigg and her Handmaidens is a good resource for pursuing such Deity-work.)
Hlin is a Goddess of refuge and protection. Though it is best when Sefa works with our other souls to deal with challenges as they arise, there are times when we all need a restful refuge, a safe space, to recover from stresses and build our strength up. Hlin can help us find such spaces, inner and outer, and help to ward them for us.
Syn is the Goddess of denial, of closing the door, setting boundaries, drawing the line. In a larger sense, she strengthens us to develop and maintain our own self-respect and our willingness to stand up for ourselves when our healthy boundaries are threatened. I don’t see her as a belligerent or confrontational Goddess at all; I perceive her as calm, dignified, wise and kind. But she is firm and insightful, understanding that our personal boundaries must have some flexibility and ‘give’, but that there is a point when we must be firm and stand up for ourselves and for others, when personal boundaries, dignity and self-respect are threatened.
Hugr is a very complex and multi-faceted soul, and its connections with Deities and their gifts and strengths are multiple. Though Hugr’s and Odin’s natures overlap a great deal, when it comes to Hugr’s warding function, I find that Syn is a natural Deity to turn to. She knows when to open the door to our inner self, and when the door must be closed and warded. Malicious Hugrs are often the culprits here, but Hugrs aligned with Syn, and with Mod’s strength and determination, can also help to remedy such situations.
Exercise 12-1: Pursuing Sefa-Awareness
A. Review the assigned reading about Sefa, open your Daybook, then sit quietly and clear a space within yourself. Begin examining, honestly and compassionately, the ways that you have pursued and experienced relationships in your life, and the emotions and needs that have driven your pursuit of different kinds of relationships. Evaluate how healthy and fulfilling your different relationships have been, for yourself and for others in the relationship. What are the weak points and strong points in the ways that you relate to others? What kinds of feedback, direct or indirect, have you received from others, that would show how perceptive and responsive you are towards them? How well or poorly have others in your relationships understood and responded to you?
B. Make a list of your different kinds of relationships, such as various familial relations, love and friendship, work and neighborhood / community relationships. What qualities would you use to describe these different relations? For example: commitment, loyalty, neediness, fear, enjoyment, common values & interests, resentment, burdensome, rejuvenation, enrichment, satisfaction, necessity, etc. Do some of your relationship-types seem healthier and more rewarding than others? Are some kinds of relationships more problematic and disappointing for you?
C. What can you learn from this analysis: about yourself, about how others treat you and respond to you, about your ability to communicate your inner self / Sefa to others, and about how well you perceive the inner selves of others?
D. What about your own Sefa, in and of itself, not as it is related to other people? Refer to the assigned reading again, to the discussion of the rune Wynn or Wunjo at the end of the article. How does your Sefa feel when it is in its ‘burg’, in its place of safety and homeliness deep within yourself, when it can just be itself naturally? Does it feel an inner joy and sense of tranquility, a sense of being as it is meant to be? Or does it feel damaged, unhomed, unsafe to be itself? Is there work here that needs to be done, to bring your Sefa to its inner place of calm, steady happiness and loving care?
These exercises are obviously a long-term effort, likely to be emotionally and intellectually demanding and tiring, but should bear good fruit for you. Take them in bite-sized chunks, but keep notes in your Daybook so that you can perceive and analyze the broader patterns of your Sefa’s nature, behavior and experiences throughout your life to date, and so you can track your progressive learning about Sefa as time goes by.
Attuning Sefa and Hugr
Exercise 12-2: Awareness of Hugr as Warder
Here is something important to understand about Hugr: your Hugr may, or may not, be willing, skilled, and effective in its warding role right now. Much depends on our maturity, our life-experiences and what we have learned from them, and also on our Hugr’s past-life experiences and training. The first steps in developing our Hugr as an effective warder require that we become aware of our Hugr and get to know and understand it as a soul-being. The Hugr exercises in the previous study guides should be pursued first, in preparation for this exercise. Hopefully, you will have recorded the results of these exercises in your Daybook, and can refer back to refresh your memory now.
All of the Hugr-exercises to date have focused on getting to know your Hugr as a soul-being and a major source of your character, temperament, personality. To date, we’ve focused on the nature of our Hugr; now we’re going to focus on one of Hugr’s major roles in our life, the role of Warder.
A warder needs to have certain qualities and abilities, and these can be exercised in ways that can be useful and helpful, or conversely can sometimes be obstructive and counter-productive. A warding Hugr may shield us from unhealthy influences, but it may also block us from worthwhile experiences and relationships, out of an excess of caution, a history of bad experiences, or due to lack of understanding and wisdom. Likewise, it may fail to block or protect us when needed. If our own Hugr is manipulative toward others (whether we are fully aware of this behavior or not), it may be so focused on manipulating others that it fails to pay attention to how we ourselves are being manipulated, and how our own Sefa is being exploited or suppressed. Keep in mind that sometimes we may do or say things to others ‘for their own good’, that are subtly manipulative even though well-intentioned. There are many semi-aware ‘relationship games’ and a lot of vicious circles we can fall into, when our Hugr’s warding function is not operating in the best way and when its awareness is distracted or distorted.
So, now let’s take a look at how your own Hugr’s warding function has operated in your life to date. I know that this exercise could feel threatening, if you have had severe negative experiences. Read through it and consider before proceeding farther. I would encourage you to see whether there is any way you can safely do some of this exercise, though, because the whole point is to improve your Hugr’s ability to ward you from repetition of your bad experiences. If you can pursue this exercise to any extent, it will help to lessen the instances and the impact of people ill-treating you (deliberately or not) in the future.
Enter stillness and open your awareness to your Hugr, as you have begun to get to know it in the previous exercises. Settle in, and begin to mesh your awareness with your Hugr, like fitting your hand into a glove. Now go through your memory and select an instance when some interaction with another person resulted in emotional pain, distress, disappointment or harm to you. If you need to, you can select a minor instance, not very impactful, in cases where your memory is too full of major and threatening situations. When I say ‘interaction’, I mean that you also were involved in what happened, you made choices and took actions, or failed to do so, as well as the other person.
Now, challenge your insight-memory, your Huginn-and-Muninn inner team, to try to pinpoint any inner warnings, clues, insights, instincts you might have had, while the situation was unfolding, that you failed to act upon. You may find your best clues to these memories, by remembering what you regretted after the event, things you wished you had done or not done or done differently, things you wish you had known or understood better.
If you can recall any warnings or inner promptings, gut feelings etc., that will show how your Hugr was trying to serve as your warder in the situation. If you don’t recall any such things, look even harder at your post-situation regrets: these are the lessons that your Hugr was trying to learn and to bring to your attention, so that you and your Hugr are wiser the next time a similar situation comes up.
Next, look for a memory of a situation that could have gone wrong, but didn’t. The time you almost said something that would have really upset or hurt someone, but you decided not to say it. Or the time when it really was important to say something risky, for your sake and / or the sake of the other person, and you did say it, and it all turned out well. Your Hugr was helping you here.
Look at some of the important choices you’ve made in your life, and try to remember whether there was any inner voice, gut feel, or instinct that guided you during those choices. If you do remember such situations, compare them with other instances in your life when you felt unrooted, without guidance or direction when you had choices and decisions to make. Compare the outcomes of those situations, and look for traces of your Hugr’s actions, however small.
Work through a number of your memories in these kinds of ways. Are you having trouble seeing any warding or guiding activity from your Hugr? If that’s the case, then you know something important now: your Hugr needs more training as a warder, and you need more awareness of your Hugr: what it is telling you, what it needs, and what it can do.
This kind of training is a lifelong endeavor, and I can’t offer a lot more step by step guidance here. Working through the Hugr exercises in the previous study guides will help a lot, as well as carefully studying my articles about the Hugr, and any other writing on the Hugr, as well. I’ll be working on a new series of articles on Heathen Soul-Craft, that will pursue training of the Hugr in more detail. If you work with Deities and / or with ancestral Hugr-spirits, seek their help in learning to be aware of your Hugr and its communications, and help in training your Hugr to ward you better.
Exercise 12-3: Tuning in to your Warding Hugr
No matter how good a job Hugr is capable of, however, it’s useless unless you actually listen to it! It’s essential to begin making a habit of this: enter into your deeper awareness, and spend some quiet time just ‘listening’ or being aware, whenever you have an important choice or decision to make, or are considering some action, especially as it involves relationships or social issues of any kind. With practice, you can briefly enter such a space, listen, exit the space, and right away take action that is based on Hugr’s guidance. You can learn do this as you go about your daily life at home, at work, anywhere: drop in briefly to consult with your Hugr, then move on as needed. Obviously, when you are dealing with more complex, long-term decisions or issues, you will want to spend more and deeper time consulting with your Hugr.
When I say ‘listen’, this is metaphorical, of course. You are not likely to hear actual words, but words or ideas may just arise in your mind. You’ll start getting a ‘sense’, a ‘feel’, an image or visualization, an urge or an idea, concerning the best course of action.
So, for this exercise, spend quiet time with your Hugr to focus on how it prefers to communicate with you, and how you can most easily perceive its messages. Is it a physical sensation, a sense of uneasiness, for example, that arises when you’re headed toward making a mistake or taking unwise action in a social situation? Do you start to get a headache or upset stomach, or feel shaky? What about positive reinforcement from your Hugr, when you are considering a situation or action that Hugr approves of? Perhaps you get a sense of relief and inner relaxation, of warmth or brightness, quiet happiness, a sense of rightness.
When you’ve identified cues and signals that work for you and your Hugr, strengthen your ability to perceive them by going through some imaginary situations, or replays of your memories, where Hugr’s guidance would be important. Play out these situations or memories, altering the memories as needed, so they become imagined success stories between you and your Hugr. This creates positive reinforcement for your training. In other words, use your imagination as a training ground for you and your Hugr to fine-tune your mutual awareness, communication, and coordinated action through dramatic, imagined scenes of success.
Modsefa and ethical action
In Heathen Anglo-Saxon and Old Saxon culture, both Sefa and Mod were seen as our Inner Self. Sefa was primarily our ‘inner Self as it relates to others’, while Mod was fundamentally the inner power, drive and Will to decide what ‘I’ want, and to pursue it. Mod is power and will; when things go wrong for it, it becomes angry and wants action. Sefa is love and caring; when things go wrong, it worries and wants a refuge. Sefa wants safety, for itself and everything it cares about.
Modsefa is the space they make together, where power and will can support love and caring, where love and caring can humanize power and will. Our Modsefa is where our understanding and pursuit of ethics and ethical action is rooted. In the process, our character is shaped and developed.
Exercise 12-4: Tuning in to your Modsefa
For this exercise, spend some time exploring these themes within yourself. How do you experience your own inner power? Where and how do you focus your Will? How do you think that power and love interact and interrelate, both positively and negatively?
What about the interrelationships between Self, Will, and caring, both as inner, spiritual-emotional phenomena, and as they are expressed through actions in the world? What do all these things mean to you, how do they shape your life and your Self? As you work through these questions and develop greater clarity about the vital interrelationships between love and power, Will and caring, you are coming to know your own Modsefa and its potentials.
You are also exploring the roots of your own personal ethical sense, grounded in your Modsefa. Take some time to explore and clarify your own ethical principles, and how you express them in your life and actions. What do you truly believe and commit to, in terms of right action in your life? How well do you follow this in practice? Is there more work you need to do here?
Gender stereotypes
You may have noticed, reading through the chapters about Sefa and Mod, that many of Sefa’s traits align with stereotypes of more womanly characteristics, while Mod aligns with more manly stereotypes. Everyone, wherever they may fall on the gender spectrum, has both of these souls. Many cultures tend to encourage certain attitudes and behaviors, and discourage others, based on our perceived gender alignment. This gives rise to the stereotypes, which, in fact, can prove to be supportive and offer social rewards if we happen to fit comfortably within the stereotypes. Of course, many people do not, and even more people must expand outside their assigned roles because of their circumstances, whether they wish to or not. The whole issue of gender roles is fraught and complex.
The practice of Heathen soul lore can, I believe, heal these potential dissonances within us. I think that our Modsefa is key to this healing, because it is the meeting space, the common ground, between our own Mod and our own Sefa. This is the place where we develop our own personal balance between these soul-forces, unique to ourself, and this is where we root our own sense of ethics and ethical behavior.
A well-developed Modsefa has access to the strengths of both Sefa and Mod, and can express them in balanced and powerful ways into the world of action and of relationships. In my view, rather than rebelling against stereotypes of masculine and feminine behaviors, we can embrace what we find to be valuable about both of them, and turn aside from their more negative or extreme expressions. Our Modsefa can handle both modes (and other modes as well), can learn to understand when and how each one is appropriate to the circumstances and to our own character and ethical beliefs, and can shift back and forth as needed along a spectrum of behaviors.
I don’t mean to imply that gender roles are the only important thing about Sefa, Mod, and Modsefa, however; far from it. This is only one of many aspects of life that these souls are involved with, and this particular issue may be of greater or of lesser importance to you on a personal level.
Building Trust between Sefa, Hugr and Mod
As you and your Hugr learn to interact wisely and strategically in social settings of all kinds, your Sefa will become more relaxed and trusting, willing to entrust its safety and wellbeing to your Hugr’s skills and insights. Likewise, when Mod and Sefa work together to create their own powerful common ground, our Modsefa, both souls are empowered to be the best that they can be. When Sefa trusts that it is safe and that access to it is well and wisely warded, it will flourish and blossom into its full power of love, caring, and taking joy in these things, even when it is in challenging situations such as caring for others who are suffering.
All religions and cultures are aware and admiring of the power of love and compassion, and what this power can accomplish in the world. Sefa provides the power of love, compassion and relatedness. Mod and Hugr energize this impetus with their strength, skills, courage and wisdom, and carry it out into the world of action and interaction, thus fulfilling Sefa’s greatest need and wish.
At the same time, Hugr protects this precious well-spring of loving power and joy, the well-spring of Wunjo within us, ensuring that it is not abused, strained, drained, or polluted by negativity. Mod and Sefa create together their common ground, Modsefa, which, if well developed, reinforces the positive strengths of both of them. Truly, the more people who can reach such a state of productive and healthy goodness and willingness to relate to others and the world around us, the better off our world of Midgard will be.
Here is a bindrune to use for meditation on the subjects of this article:
Durkan, Maire. Circle of Frith: A Devotional to Frigg and her Handmaidens. Philadelphia, PA: The Troth, 2021.